How Kisses Delavin made me feel infinite

Kisses Delavin performing at her sold-out album launch at the SM Skydome last year.
In 2015, I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. When you have BPD, you constantly need to be validated.

People with BPD usually grew up in an environment that constantly made them feel like their emotions and thoughts don’t matter. Like they themselves don’t matter. That’s how I was made to feel growing up. So now, the best thing someone can do for me is to let me know that I made a difference in his or her life. Because that makes me feel like I matter.

Honestly, Pinoy Big Brother Lucky 7 alum Kisses Delavin and I haven’t been friends for that long. I also haven’t told her much about my condition, but somehow, she knew exactly what to do to make me feel like I matter to her.

Upon meeting Kisses for the first time, I made up my mind to do what I can to help her. I was an only child for most of my life, and I’m unable to spend enough time with my half-sister, so I enjoy taking up-and-comers like Kisses under my wing. That makes me feel like a real Kuya.

Anyway, in my case, helping Kisses meant giving her advice whenever she needed it, as well as posting about her on social media. I didn’t think that would be a big deal, because there were a lot of other people doing the same for her. Nor did I ask for anything in return for my efforts. Seeing her thrive in the industry is enough of a reward for me.

So you can imagine how surprised I was to receive a personal invite from Kisses to attend her album launch at the SM Skydome. That in itself was already a big deal to me because celebrities rarely do things like that. And as if that wasn’t surprising enough, when I arrived at the SM Skydome, one of the Kissables asked if I’d opened my copy of the album already. 

When I said no, she went with me to the registration table and helped me get my copy of the album, as well as the mini-magazine about Kisses. After we made our way back to our seats, I unwrapped the album and gasped when I saw my name in her thank-yous.

Do you see my name? It's right there at the top, along with Princess France Sajorda's and Pao Flores's.
I was so touched by what she wrote that my lower lip trembled. Luckily the show finally began, and I got too caught up in the music to cry. But I still felt touched.

By thanking me in the liner notes of her debut album, she did what most people fail to do for a BPD sufferer. She validated me. She let me know that everything I did for her mattered.

It was a simple gesture that made me feel infinite.

Belated happy birthday, Kisses. May God bless you more so you can keep being a blessing to others.


The old Julian can't come to the phone right now.


  1. Makautang beses Na ako basahin Ang article mo kay Kisses sir Julian. Thank you po loving our Kween.. keep safe

  2. Nakakaiyak Sir Julian ��
    Thank you for loving her ��
    Indeed!napakabait na bata ni Kisses